My Spiritual Journey – A Summary – 2017
The mere thought of my Guru's feet fills me with a sense of immense blessing and devotion.
I was born in Bodinayakkanur, and even at the age of three, I began to wonder, "Who am I? Where was I before this?" These questions often led me into deep contemplation, a level of thought unusual for a young child. I became an enigma to my family, always lost in profound thoughts. I would sit, holding the window bar and staring at the road outside, feeling like a captive from another world, confined in my own space.
In my early childhood, my first spiritual guide was my great grandmother, who introduced me to the worship of Hindu Gods. She taught me that by performing dharma, one can draw nearer to God. My grandmother, a divine figure adorned with golden hanging ear jewelry, would gently place her soft hands on my head and impart spiritual energy, giving me my first spiritual initiation. This moment has remained a guiding force in my life.
At a very young age, I asked her, "Grandma, is there a God?" She simply replied, "If one believes, He exists; if not, He doesn't." I couldn’t grasp the depth of this statement then, but with time, its meaning became clear. My devotion continued as I followed the path of devotion until the age of fifteen.
At fifteen, I joined Vedathiri Maharishi’s (the Wisdom Temple) Mind Development Center, where I began learning yoga and meditation. There, I received a new perspective on God. After practicing the wisdom and techniques of the Wisdom Temple for ten years (until I was 25), I still felt there was something missing, a slight emptiness within me. I began to realize the thin gap between metaphysical philosophy and experiential realization.
At the age of twenty-six, I met with an accident while riding a two-wheeler and was bedridden for ten days. During this time, I underwent a transformation. I realized that happiness is very important for a human being. The Lord who signifies happiness in life is Mahavishnu. This thought deeply rooted in my mind. My brother and best friend, Pazhani Sivarama Rajah, invited me to Tirupati for the first time. When I approached Lord Tirupati, I felt an overwhelming sense of joy, as if I was reunited with my mother after a long separation. I cried uncontrollably for two hours in the temple campus. From then on, I became a Lord Vishnu devotee.
I started visiting various Vishnu temples and chanting the 108 names of Vishnu, the 1008 names of Vishnu, and the Japamala. This brought immense joy and energy to my life.
A rare experience I had in 2007 while working in Bangalore. At that time, I was a devout follower of Lord Venkateswara. Every Saturday, I would avoid eating meat and visit the Perumal temple with my family. (By the grace of my guru, since 2012, my family and I have been following a strict Shaivite diet.) Due to my deep affection for my Lord, I would often memorize and recite many of the 4000 Divya Prabandha hymns, chant the 108 names of Perumal, and write poems in praise of Him. These were my favorite pastimes.
Additionally, since before my marriage (in 2003), following the advice of my friend Sethupathi, I have been performing regular worship of Lord Kalabhairava to mitigate the effects of my severe karma and doshas. Every week, I would worship Bhairava at the Abhirami Amman temple in Dindigul and the Soundarraja Perumal temple in Thadikombu. When I was away on work, I would call my young uncle, Mr. Irulesan, and ask him to perform the worship on my behalf. He would immediately do so at the Murugan temple in Ramnad.
For many years, I had been suffering from severe lower back pain due to constant computer work. Despite trying various English medical treatments, I found no relief. The doctors suggested injecting a specific Vitamin B12 medication, but there was no guarantee of success. One Sunday, I visited my doctor friend's clinic, and he administered the injection. Within twenty seconds, I felt a strange, dark sensation, as if I was being pulled away from my body. The next moment, I found myself standing in front of my beloved Lord Venkateswara, who was radiating an extraordinary, indescribable light. He looked at me with the affection of a mother and smiled.
I had no memory of my family or life on earth. I yearned to merge with His divine light form. However, someone suddenly pulled me back, and I regained consciousness to find myself on the clinic bed. My doctor friend was standing beside me, smiling and holding another injection. I felt intense anger and frustration, realizing I had missed the opportunity to unite with my Lord. I left the clinic without thanking my friend or paying the fees.
This experience taught me that, for those who live with unwavering faith in God, death is not a painful experience but the ultimate bliss. Though I had missed that opportunity, I wanted to offer special worship to Kalabhairava. I immediately called my close friend and brother, Pazhani Sivaraja Rajah, and asked him to perform the worship at the massive Kalabhairava shrine at the foot of the Palani hills. Despite the early morning chill, he kindly obliged and performed the worship on my behalf.
After this experience, I developed an interest in natural foods and Tamil Siddha medicine. I started reading about Sage Agathiyar, who wrote the first Tamil grammar, several Siddha medicine books, and discovered the art of Varmakalai. I stopped eating meat altogether and replaced it with Trikatu Choornam and Nilavembu.
In 2014-2015, I spent a year in Germany, cooking and working alone. This year brought about another significant change in my life. One day, my friend Devaraj took me to a German swimming pool and taught me how to swim. He asked me to practice holding my breath underwater. I tried, but couldn't hold my breath for even five seconds. I returned to my room, feeling disappointed, and searched online for tips on how to hold my breath while swimming.
That search led me to Pranayama. The first search result was a speech by writer Balakumaran about Pranayama in Singapore .
I immediately worshiped Guru Agathiyar and tried to hold my breath for 10 seconds. When I held my breath, huge ghostly figures appeared in my mind, frightening me. But the Anjaneyar Vasiakatta Mantra, bestowed by Agathiyar, dispelled the unnecessary fear. I learned to hold my breath for up to 80 seconds, gradually increasing the duration. This transitioned me from the path of devotion to the path of yoga. Within six months, I lost 12 kilograms. I felt energetic every day and could easily withstand the extreme cold in minus temperatures.
In May 2015, one evening, I suddenly had an idea. I combined some extreme Hatha Yoga postures (which I do not wish to elaborate on for safety reasons). During one of these dangerous postures, as I held my breath, my soul suddenly left my body and entered a bright, radiant light. I couldn’t comprehend what was happening. For a few minutes, I was immersed in the light, experiencing a profound, blissful state. This time, however, I was aware enough to think clearly. I searched for my surroundings—where had the furniture, the chair, the bed, gone? There was nothing but a vast expanse of light. There was no physical form, but I could still think without my physical body as a light. For a few minutes, I couldn’t understand what to do. I felt a deep worry, wondering how I would return to my body. Did I make a huge mistake? How would I get back? I then recalled that the previous year, I had prayed to my Guru Agathiyar, and had repeatedly chanted his Guru mantra. I decided that only Sage Agathiyar could save me now, so I continued chanting that mantra. Om Agatheesaya Namaha . After a few minutes, I felt as though something was pressing down from above. Suddenly, I was back in my body, sitting in the same position in my room. A wave of peace washed over me as I realized I had escaped that Light experience. I thanked my Guru for saving me, acknowledging my mistake, and seeking his compassion for this error ( later realized that this is not an error, it is the great blessing ). I paid my respects to the holy feet of my Guru, Agathiyar, who had rescued me with grace. This transformative event took place in Stuttgart, Germany, while I was staying at the Bosch apartment on Stromberg Strasse. This is turning point in my life.
After this incident, I experienced physical disturbances and stomach pain for several days, but Agathiyar’s grace helped me recover. I have no desire to experiment further with such practices, as my Guru would never approve of them. Sage Agathiyar guided me to find a proper pranayama teacher, and through his grace, I connected with a professor Dr.Raja Krishnamoorthy from Madurai who taught me (online guidance) the importance of pranayama for holistic living. This brought me great peace and joy.
From my experience, I have learned that to live a blessed life and ultimately merge with the Divine, we do not need to undergo extreme practices. Many people, (especially females and senior citizens ) are not comfortable with kumbaka pranayama. We can all live fulfilling lives, worship our personal deities, and receive the Divine’s blessings while enjoying life. There are simpler ways to attain liberation.
books, I fully realized that each word in them came directly from higher souls and not from human beings. books link as below.
http://enlightenedbeings.org/books
Gnanalayam Pondicherry - Kaliyuga Kaviyam
Today, with the blessings of our Gurunathar, I am highly encouraged to share these books with you. You must read them to understand where you stand in this current Kali Yuga and how to proceed further.
Caretaker mindset
I have two children. One Thursday 20-Oct-2016 morning prayer , I was standing in front of Guru Nathar to worship him, feeling a bit sad as I didn’t have any flowers. At that moment, a strange thought occurred to me. I called my two daughters, made them stand before Guru Nathar, and said, “Oh divine sage with flower-like feet! Today, with a full heart, I offer these two daughters to you as your own daughters.”
"From today onwards, I, your humble servant, will raise your daughters and fulfill my duty as their caretaker, my Lord! Whether they achieve great feats and win medals or face trials and gain valuable experiences — for both, you alone will be their father and take responsibility. I will only carry out my duty with utmost dedication and sincerity," I wholeheartedly pledged.
My recommendation to readers, for the life towards the enlightenment.
"Generally, until the age of 40, we don't think about spiritual practices for our life's purpose. This is because our focus is entirely on family and earning a living. We should understand our life's purpose by the time we are 40. It doesn't mean that we should become a Brahmachari or Sanyasi immediately at the age of 40. Just like how a light bulb turns on with the flick of a switch, after 60, we might easily attain mental peace and spiritual practices for our life's purpose. But thinking that it will happen automatically is not possible. We should prepare ourselves from 40 to 60 years by practicing slowly.
When I read the book "Vaalviyal" from Pondicherry Gnanaalayam, I got the idea to plan and chart out how to do this. With the blessings of my Guru, I have created a chart below. I hope it will be useful to you.
Daily involvement in worship and spiritual practice % (without affecting family and work life)"
"The aforementioned percentage refers to the daily waking hours. For example, if you are awake for 12 hours a day, 5% of that would be 36 minutes."
In other words, the percentage is calculated based on the total number of hours you are awake and alert in a day, and then converted into minutes.
I continue to study the works of Siddhas and practitioners in the yoga tradition and share my experiences as I progress.
With reverence,
Agathiya Bakthan.
%20(1).jpeg)
.jpeg)
%20(1).jpg)
கருத்துகள் இல்லை:
கருத்துரையிடுக